The Misfortune Manifestation and Revelation of Onesiphorus Wood
Onesiphorus Wood is your average fifteen-year-old boy with orangutan arms, a big goofy nose, and hair shaped like a permanent swirly. Thanks to his miserable past, seemingly screwed up present, and mundane future, he is convinced his life sucks.
When Onee wonders if there is something more to the life he’s been living, something profoundly strange happens. He finds himself on a whirlwind adventure no one can explain. What would you do if you were burned half-to-death in Sodom, crushed by the Red Sea, and had a hand in making the walls of Jericho fall down, but couldn’t remember doing it?
Here lies Onee’s gigantic problem; his Heavenly Father–who he knows nothing about–is behind all the craziness and turmoil. He is teaching Onee a valuable lesson by dropping him in the middle of the most famous Bible stories, so he can suffer through the bane and misfortune of others. Onee learns this: if you’re convinced your life sucks, someone else’s sucks worse, and to be saved, you must lose everything you love and die. For Onee, this required dying three times for good measure’s sake, and then forgetting it ever happened in the first place.
Onee’s problem seemed impossible to solve, but with help from his best friend, Dee–the world’s craziest dresser and braided-hair enthusiast–they may actually be able to solve it. Join Onee as he tells you his unforgettable story; how you must lose your life and everything you love in order to get it back. And when all hope seems lost, you can still find it in the most surprising places: the eyes of a frog, wearing enormous high heels, and the support of a friend who is willing to knock someone out cold for you.
Can Onee and Dee’s friendship survive festering uncertainty, constantly being on the run, and a million waffled questions? . . . all while their whole world crumbles around them like the walls of Jericho? Or, will Onee wake up one day to discover his beastly mess was one gigantic dream he will never forget?
A preview of what’s to come from author C.E. Danielson
A brief history
For one thousand years, peace and prosperity have ruled the earth. The kingdom age, or the millennial reign, was unlike any other, full of grace and truth. The Prince of Peace, King David, and the saints dwelt and ruled with a rod of iron in the beloved city. The earth had never known such a time as this, but now, it is crying in desperation for deliverance.
The Prince of Peace has turned his back on man, withdrawn his covering of protection, and allowed a final, ferocious testing to commence—a sifting or weeding out of the truly faithful and obedient servants. The seal, which was set in place over the prince of the air’s prison one thousand years before, has been removed. Apollyon has been loosed from his prison within the depths of the earth, but only for a single season. He has gathered together all evil from the days of old: the giants, fallen angels, and deplorable tribes. They are once again breathing out cruelty, deceit, and lies, winning over the souls of men. Apollyon and his minion, Abbadon, seek to destroy and devour every last person who belongs to El Shaddai.
The two forces have waged a war unlike any other. The sun no longer knows when to rise and when to set, and time has stopped in anticipation of the promise of deliverance. This promise lies within the Holy Word, a day when fire will rain down from the mouth of El Shaddai and heaven, vanquishing evil for all eternity.
The darkness has come to rule the day, and the light is fleeting along with mankind’s hope. Abbadon and his followers will stop at nothing to see that every copy of the Holy Word is demolished. If the Holy Scriptures and all its promises are gone, hope will be lost, and every living soul will turn its back on El Shaddai. The scriptures must be protected, thus the calling of the seven.
For you are all children of the light and of the day; we don’t belong to the darkness and night. So be on your guard, not asleep like the others. Stay alert and be clearheaded. Let us who live in the light be clearheaded, protected by the armor of faith and love and wearing as our helmet the confidence of our salvation. El Shaddai chose to save us through our Prince of Peace, not to pour out his anger on us. The Prince of Peace died for us so that, whether we are dead or alive when he returns, we can live with him forever. So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing. Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is El Shaddai’s will for you who belong to the Prince of Peace. Do not stifle the Holy Spirit. Do not scoff at prophecies, but test everything that is said. Stay away from every kind of evil, and hold on to what is good.
Seven will join together. Their gifts must over power all.
In a world where hope is lost, they must find it to prevent a fall.
Battling against an evil, stretching the bands of time, the prince of the air seeks to destroy and devour all that is mine. Apollyon will not rest until all bow to him as king. Those who do not sing his praises will be cast in the valley of gehinnom.
But I am ruler over all, creator, father, and friend.
I have the power to save the lost, and I will vanquish him in the end.